Family Values
I am a pig.
At least that's what many women (and even some men) would say about me. Why? I believe greatly in traditional family values. In doing so, I see nothing wrong with a woman being a stay-at-home mom. That's right, I believe it's perfectly fine and dandy for a woman to want to put a career on the back burner and take care of her family. I see nothing wrong with a woman being the soccer mom that attends as many of her kids activities as possible. I see nothing wrong with a woman being at all of the PTA meetings and helping to plan school functions. I see nothing wrong with a woman being at home after the kids are dropped off by the school bus so that they aren't left alone during the day and have help with their homework. I see nothing wrong with mom (and dad) making dinner and everyone sitting down at the table to enjoy a nice dinner and conversation.
I see nothing wrong with a woman being June Cleaver if she so chooses.
Yet, society seems to think the type of woman mentioned above is a failure and is somehow against the advancement of women's rights. Now, I'm not against a woman going to college, having a career or anything like that. But there are many women who want to be June Cleaver but also feel pressured by society to conform to the "norm" that is a mom being at work 60 hours a week and relying on others to raise their children. I'm of the opinion that this type of mentality is directly responsible for the United States having a divorce rate of over 50% and why we have, according to one website, the third highest divorce rate in the world. I also believe that this type of mentality is responsible for our children turning out to be the dilenquants that most seem to be today. Juvenile detention centers are filling up fast. In many cases it's because the child has no family support at home. This conformity is directly responsibly for all of this.
It all really irks me.
Most would think that me being in the business that I'm in and doing some of the things that I do that I don't give a rip about family values. But that's exactly the opposite of how I feel. I was fortunate enough to experience what a real family is like and I want to be able to pass the same on to my children when I have them. My mom did have a very successful career but she also made time for us; she had a balance. These days it almost seems like even having a balance is wrong and anti-woman. My question is simply "why."
The Bible says in many places that women are to be submissive to their husbands and that they are to run the household and do the bulk of work involved in raising the children. Each gender was given a role in life by God, yet we think today that this is totally wrong. I'm not saying by any means that women should be slaves to their husbands and, again, if they want to have a career outside of the home then that's just fine. But women and men (don't think for a second that I would exclude the husband from all of this) should have a balance so that the family doesn't suffer. Then maybe we won't have such a high divorce rate and maybe our children will be better raised and turn out to be better people when they're in our shoes.
I also believe actually disciplining our children would help out with a lot of the problems we see with our kids today. I was spanked as a kid and I turned out just fine. I didn't have any of this "time out" or the other B.S. punishments that are doled out today. I'm not saying beat the living daylights out of a kid or that they shouldn't have punishments such as grounding when their older; however, I see nothing wrong with spanking a child. And please, parents, let's actually do something with our kids besides watch T.V. Go outside and shoot some hoops. Go to a baseball game. Do something!
Don't take this as an anti-woman rant or take this as "Jonathan's stuck in the 20th century." I just see nothing wrong with a family being just that, a family. I know that when I start a family I'll strive for this. If everyone else shared this mentality, I believe this world would be a much better place.
--Jonathan
At least that's what many women (and even some men) would say about me. Why? I believe greatly in traditional family values. In doing so, I see nothing wrong with a woman being a stay-at-home mom. That's right, I believe it's perfectly fine and dandy for a woman to want to put a career on the back burner and take care of her family. I see nothing wrong with a woman being the soccer mom that attends as many of her kids activities as possible. I see nothing wrong with a woman being at all of the PTA meetings and helping to plan school functions. I see nothing wrong with a woman being at home after the kids are dropped off by the school bus so that they aren't left alone during the day and have help with their homework. I see nothing wrong with mom (and dad) making dinner and everyone sitting down at the table to enjoy a nice dinner and conversation.
I see nothing wrong with a woman being June Cleaver if she so chooses.
Yet, society seems to think the type of woman mentioned above is a failure and is somehow against the advancement of women's rights. Now, I'm not against a woman going to college, having a career or anything like that. But there are many women who want to be June Cleaver but also feel pressured by society to conform to the "norm" that is a mom being at work 60 hours a week and relying on others to raise their children. I'm of the opinion that this type of mentality is directly responsible for the United States having a divorce rate of over 50% and why we have, according to one website, the third highest divorce rate in the world. I also believe that this type of mentality is responsible for our children turning out to be the dilenquants that most seem to be today. Juvenile detention centers are filling up fast. In many cases it's because the child has no family support at home. This conformity is directly responsibly for all of this.
It all really irks me.
Most would think that me being in the business that I'm in and doing some of the things that I do that I don't give a rip about family values. But that's exactly the opposite of how I feel. I was fortunate enough to experience what a real family is like and I want to be able to pass the same on to my children when I have them. My mom did have a very successful career but she also made time for us; she had a balance. These days it almost seems like even having a balance is wrong and anti-woman. My question is simply "why."
The Bible says in many places that women are to be submissive to their husbands and that they are to run the household and do the bulk of work involved in raising the children. Each gender was given a role in life by God, yet we think today that this is totally wrong. I'm not saying by any means that women should be slaves to their husbands and, again, if they want to have a career outside of the home then that's just fine. But women and men (don't think for a second that I would exclude the husband from all of this) should have a balance so that the family doesn't suffer. Then maybe we won't have such a high divorce rate and maybe our children will be better raised and turn out to be better people when they're in our shoes.
I also believe actually disciplining our children would help out with a lot of the problems we see with our kids today. I was spanked as a kid and I turned out just fine. I didn't have any of this "time out" or the other B.S. punishments that are doled out today. I'm not saying beat the living daylights out of a kid or that they shouldn't have punishments such as grounding when their older; however, I see nothing wrong with spanking a child. And please, parents, let's actually do something with our kids besides watch T.V. Go outside and shoot some hoops. Go to a baseball game. Do something!
Don't take this as an anti-woman rant or take this as "Jonathan's stuck in the 20th century." I just see nothing wrong with a family being just that, a family. I know that when I start a family I'll strive for this. If everyone else shared this mentality, I believe this world would be a much better place.
--Jonathan
posted by Jonathan at
4:51 PM
3 Comments:
I want to marry you... I soooo feel that the woman should have the right to choose to be a stay at home mom... i love my career but thats just what it is.. a career.. once you have kids and a husband then your family becomes your career unless it is a necessity that both parents work full time.
By
Anonymous, At
8:16 PM
wow. i hate the number of misinformed people that read your blog Jon. really. I do. the number-one cause of divorce is (drum roll please) financial problems. fights about money; who gets to spend it, who's going to make it, and who is going to have the control.
Jamie. "damn feminists" have nothing to do with this issue. Feminism, incase you didn't know is more about empowerment. there are so many women these days that have been brain washed into thinking that they have to fit into these little boxes. Feminism, above all else is about having women realize their potential and having them do what they wish with it. There is NO feminist I know of that thinks that all women must work, and throw the rest of their lives into reckless abandon just to fulfill their careers. This is like saying that because being a preist is a sacrament in the cathloic church, we should all be preists to fulfil this sacrament. ...bullshit? i think so too.
Mandy. It's great that you are going to quit your career once you have kids. that's very noble. it is far harder to be a full-time mom than anything else. I encourage you in this endeavour whenever it may come about.
Cassie. Same to you. I hope everything works out.
Jon, as far as you are concerned--are not a pig. i know you far far too well to ever call you that. however, a trust-worthy blogger, you are not. next time you say it's on such&such a website, show me. tell me where you got the statistic from. that pisses me off when you don't...when anyone doesn't.
personally,i fully intend to get a job as a writer, something that I can do from the house so that I can take care of the kids too. My mom was there for me, and I don't see any reason, unless my husband wants to be a stay-at-home dad, why I can't. Times they are a-changin' and two incomes is a good thing.
one thing i can tell you for sure is that a woman working and not being a stay at home mom shouldn't have any sort of impact on a marriage as long as she has it together.
i love you jon.
k*tie
By
Anonymous, At
11:20 PM
where, anywhere in there did i say "i am a feminist, and i believe that this is exactly how you should live your life?" It's impressive how people jump on the defensive when they hear someone else's idea.
if you feel empowered without calling yourself a feminist, great. that's great.
i prefer to call myself a feminist, because i identify with more than just their view on where women belong, be it in the work-place or the home. there are other issues you know. Republicans and Democrats, too, speak on more than just one topic. I would rather be associated with being a feminist than not.
you'll never get anywhere in life by shunning others.
do whatever you want.
you just seemed sorely uneducated on what feminism is. so i offered a few words. never meaning to offend you.
i'm a pacifist.
i don't fit into any one box.
i'm a large stack of boxes, one on top of the other.
there is more to me than just one view and personality.
obviously you'll never change your view on feminism, and have little regard for those that are involved in the on-going feminist movement, as is prominantly displayed by your snide side comments.
just because i didn't take a survey of every feminist in existance to find out how they think that women should live their lives doesn't make my statement any less valid. you go and survey as many people as you possibly can about where women "belong" and it still won't be enough. You're a smart girl and are able to realize that this is impossible.
If the whole world was required to have exact statistics and poingiant quotes every time they spoke, a lot of things wouldn't get said. Jon wouldn't have his job, you would have no way to insult me unless you did a background check, and George Bush would be mute.
so lets agree to disagree, and both be bitches in our own corners of the world.
all the best.
k*tie
By
Anonymous, At
1:35 AM
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